


Fate's Choice

by Chelsea072498



Category: SPN, Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Depression, Loss, Medical Emergency, SPN - Freeform, Supernatural - Freeform, mentions of controversial (to some) medical procedure, possible triggers, read warnings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-29
Updated: 2018-03-29
Packaged: 2019-04-14 12:24:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14135982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chelsea072498/pseuds/Chelsea072498
Summary: Quick Info - Fate forces choices to be made by Y/N and Dean after one night together.Word Count - 5773Warnings/Triggers - pregnancy, controversial (to some) medical procedure discussed, medical emergency, loss, depressionTiny bit of fluff in thereI tried to warn without spoiling the story. If you are unsure about whether these things will be upsetting to you, turn back now.





	Fate's Choice

##  **Fate’s Choice WARNINGS AND TRIGGERS!!!**

“I had fun.” Dean played with a strand of her hair. “I didn’t expect it.”

“Neither did I.” Y/N smiled back. “I think after this last week, it was kind of inevitable. There’s always been something here but we’ve always been scared to cross the line.”

He sat up. “Y/N, I don’t want to ruin our friendship. I don’t want to do anything to lose you.”

Y/N turned and kissed his cheek. “Never going to happen.” She got up from the bed and reached for her bag. “I’m going to shower. I’ll go grab breakfast after that.”

“Wait,” Dean was in front of her in seconds. “Are we good?”

“Always.” Y/N touched his cheek. “I really enjoyed last night, Dean. It was the most incredible, beautiful night of my life. I think you and I both know that if it happens again, it’s gotten be the same kind of circumstances. Neither of us are commitment people.”

“I know. I just need to know we’re okay.”

“Yes.” She dared to kiss his lips. “We’re perfect.”

~*~

Returning to the bunker meant getting back to their normal routines. They both worried that it would be more difficult than it was, but things fell into place.

A few weeks later, a case came up. Werewolves in Nebraska. Sam was sick, which was rare for a Winchester, so once again, Dean and Y/N were on their own.

Things went according to plan, though Dean was worried about Y/N. He swore that she’d almost passed out when they were chasing the last werewolf.

“I’m fine!” She insisted with a smile.

“You just looked a little out of it.” Dean glanced over. “Hungry?”

“Starving.” Y/N said. “I know you need a shower. Trust me to take the car to get food and beer?”

“You’re a better driver than Sammy.” Dean winked.

Thirty minutes later, Y/N stood in the aisle shaking. This was not what she expected to be buying in a drug store. It was overwhelming. There were so many to choose from.

She grabbed one she’d seen advertised on television, paid, and rushed to the diner close by. After she ordered the food, she slipped into the bathroom and carefully opened the test. She knew from a few of her friends that if it was positive, she’d know quickly.

Two lines.

There were two lines.

Y/N grabbed the counter to hold herself up. She checked her phone. She went back through dates.

She knew though. She hadn’t been with anyone else in seven months.

Y/N was pregnant with Dean’s baby.

She splashed water on her face and threw the test in the garbage. No reason to keep it. She’d never tell Dean anything anyway. She couldn’t. Dean Winchester was a hunter. He once confessed that he wanted a family but he knew it was too late. He knew he was in too deep at this point to have a wife, kids, and picket fence.

Y/N was too. She was a hunter. She grew up a hunter. Once, a long time ago, she thought about leaving the life and finding a man…It was something that was never to happen.

“You forgot the beer.” Dean teased after she came back.

“Shit. I’m sorry.” Y/N put the food on the table. “I’ll go and…” She stopped. “Shit!”

She raced to the bathroom just in time. Ten minutes later, she was leaning against the wall, trying to catch her breath.

“Y/N! Are you okay?” Dean was banging on the door. “Sweetheart?”  
  


“Just a second.” She begged. “Just give me a second, please.” Slowly, she pulled herself up and washed her, brushed her teeth, and opened the door. “Sorry.”

“Your face is flushed.” Dean put his hand to her forehead. “You’re clammy.”

“I’m fine. I probably just caught whatever Sam’s had.” Y/N walked to the bed. “Can you hand me my sandwich and iced tea.”

“Y/N?” Dean was concerned.

“I have to eat, Dean.” She looked down. She was more aware of the large king bed they shared for the last few nights. Just like the night….

She fought her emotions and forced the food down. She gave Dean the piece of pie she’d gotten herself and settled back on the bed. Once he finished with his food, he settled back and pulled her close.

“I…I don’t want you getting sick.” She told him.   
  


“Shh, let me worry about that.” Dean whispered. “I’m sorry he got you sick.”

“Dean, it happens.” Y/N squeezed her eyes shut. She could tell him the truth. Y/N knew she should tell him the truth. “Dean, I…”

His phone rang and he looked regretful as he answered. “Hey, Garth….It’ll take me a couple of days. Y/N’s sick….No, man, Sam passed on whatever he had…Yeah, I want to get her home and in her own bed. I’ll be on my way after that.”

“Hey, I’ll be good to go.” Y/N told him.

Dean shook his head. “Sit one out. You and Sam can take three without me.” He winked.

“Maybe.” Y/N sat up. “Dean, I need to tell you something.” Not even two hours, and she felt the weight of the secret pressing down. “The night we…”

“I wondered if that might come up.” He bit his lip and rubbed the back of his neck. “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think about it. I’d be lying if I told you I didn’t go to your door some nights…”

“Dean…”

“You’re one of my best friends, Y/N. I’m scared to go there again. It was amazing but we live together, we work together, and we aren’t together. I don’t know that I want that….”

“I get it.” Y/N looked down. “You thought that’s what I was going to say?”

“No, but you gave me the opening.” Dean took her hands. “You’re fucking special to me and I don’t want to ruin that.”

Y/N smiled. “You have been there for me so many times in my life, Dean. I don’t want anything to come between us.” She meant that. Her heart ached a little knowing what she had to do. “We haven’t talked about it and I just…”

“We’re good.” He kissed the top of her head. “You want a shower before we go to sleep?”

“You’re not going out? It’s early.”

“I figured we’d put on a movie and fall asleep. I want to get you home early tomorrow and get some rest before I head back out.”

“I can come with you.”

“No,” Dean shook his head. “You need some rest and honestly,” Dean smiled at her. “If I don’t get a few days away from you, I’ll do something we might both regret.”

~*~

Sam was feeling better and joined Dean on the hunt. Y/N gave it a day and then packed a couple of bags and headed to Sioux Falls. Jody. Jody would help her.

Jody wasn’t home though. She and Claire were hunting in Canada with Donna. Patience let her in, a small look of concern crossing her face.

“If you saw something, I don’t want to know.” Y/N told her.

“It’s not supernatural related.”

“I don’t care. I don’t want to know.” Y/N snapped. “I’m sorry.”

“I get it.” Patience grabbed her bag. “I have to go to the store. Need anything?”

“I’m good. I’ll just wait for Alex.”

Alex wandered in a few minutes later and saw Y/N sitting on the couch, bawling.

“What the hell?”

Y/N jumped up. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I came. I shouldn’t have. This is stupid. I can’t ask anyone of you…I have to go..”

Alex shook her head. “What is it? What’s wrong? Where’s Dean? I’ll call him.”

“No!” Y/N shook her head. “No, you can’t call him.” Y/N cried. “You can’t…”

Alex led her back to the couch. Y/N broke down and told her everything.

“I’m an idiot for coming here. I’ve just put you in a terrible position.”

“No, you didn’t. Telling me is different than telling Jody or Donna, or Claire or Patience. I’m a medical professional. I won’t tell anyone anything, unless I absolutely have no choice.” Alex took a deep breath. “Have you seen a doctor yet?”

“No,” Y/N shook her head. “I need to schedule….I can’t have the baby.”

Alex’s eyes widened. “I know you and Dean aren’t together, but I can’t imagine him not being happy about a baby. And I think he’s got a huge thing for you.”

“We’re friends. This…I don’t want him feeling obligated or guilty. I don’t him to resent our child later.”

“He wouldn’t.” Alex had a feeling this child was exactly what Dean wanted. “You need to see a doctor. Let me take you to a clinic I know of. They won’t ask any questions. You’ll get a test to confirm the pregnancy, talk to a doctor, and if you’re sure about…well, you have to talk to someone before they’ll schedule it.”

“Yeah, okay.” Y/N nodded. “I need to get this done soon.”

“You can’t just jump back into hunting,” Alex warned her. “You’ll need time. Your body, and your emotions, will need to heal.”

“Yeah, I guess that’s….yeah.” Y/N took a deep breath. “We can go soon?”

Alex nodded. “We can go now.”

~*~

Three days later, Y/N walked into the clinic alone. Alex was working and she’d moved to a motel before Jody returned. Alex agreed not to say anything but told her to have a nurse call her when the procedure began and she’d come pick her up. Alex covered for enough people she knew she could get someone to cover her shift.

The counselor joined Y/N in the room before the doctor and nurses were to come in. “I just wanted to make sure you’re okay with this decision.”

“Yep.” Y/N nodded. She felt nauseous. She felt dizzy.

She was about to give up her only chance to be a mother.

“It isn’t too late. You still have time to really think about this. You can leave today and come back next week, or the week after. You could speak to the father and see…”

“I can’t do that. I told you. He’s a good man. He’s the best. This isn’t something I want to burden him with.”

“What if he doesn’t see it that way?” She asked Y/N. “What if this is the news he’s been waiting for?”

“Trust me. This is the last thing he wants to hear from me.”

~*~

“You haven’t seen her?” Dean asked. He looked at Claire. “She hasn’t been here?”

“We were gone until yesterday. Alex has been working a lot.” Claire looked at Patience as she entered the living room. “Have you seen Y/N?”

“She was here a few days ago. I haven’t seen her since.”

Jody sent a text. “Alex knows something. I knew she was acting funny.”

~*~

Y/N sat quietly, waiting for the doctor. The nurse popped in a few minutes earlier to tell her that they were running behind.

She heard her phone and grabbed it from her bag. Her heart dropped when she read the text from Alex

She was shaking when she saw the texts from Dean

The door opened and a nurse walked in. “We confirmed your pregnancy through blood and urine. The doctor wants to know if you’d like to view the ultrasound.”

“Ultrasound?” Y/N asked.

“You don’t have to get it, but you gave your consent on the form. Was that a mistake?”

Y/N shook her head. “What?”

“You selected that you wanted an ultrasound before the procedure. Is that correct?”

“I…” Y/N was shaking. Dean would find her. He would never forgive her. She’d lose her best friend.

If she had the baby, she’d lose him anyway.

“Yes,” Y/N couldn’t believe it when the word came out. “I…I want to see the ultrasound.”

~*~

“That’s thirty minutes outside of town! She’s not answering texts!” Dean was frantic. Sam had to force him into the passenger’s seat. “Jody…”

“Dean, cops can’t just walk in and stop her. Maybe with a court order..”

“Get one!”

“Dean! I can’t just pull one out of thin air and I definitely can’t pull one of thin air for a man who is supposed to be dead six times over. Just get to the clinic and use whatever charm you can. They’re going to try and protect her. They won’t tell you she’s there.”

“Okay, I’m calm. I can do this.”

Sam glanced at his brother. “I suspected something happened finally.”

“Not now, Sam.” Dean put his hand up. “She’s scared. That’s it. She thinks she’s doing what I want.”

“Isn’t this what you want?”

Dean shook his head. “No. I want a family and if this is how I get that, so be it.”

~*~

Y/N sat holding the tiny picture. Her baby. Her child.

She was sure everyone walking past her was judging her emotional state, but she didn’t care.

“Y/N?”

She stood up and opened her mouth but words wouldn’t come. Dean slowly approached her. “Are you….is everything….”

“I didn’t do it.” Y/N whispered. She held the pictures up. “I couldn’t.”

Dean looked at the pictures. It took a moment for him to realize that he was looking at a picture of his child. “Wow,” He pulled her into his arms. “It’s okay. We can talk about this, Y/N. We can figure it out.”

“This complicates things, Dean. This obligates you…”

He lifted her chin and smiled into her eyes. “We didn’t plan this, but it’s happening.” He paused and looked at her. “Right? Did you just not go through because I found out?”

“I couldn’t.” Y/N began to cry again. “I thought this was best for both of us. I knew if I told you, you’d never tell me to do it, you’d never push it. When I get here, I started to have doubts. I was scared. I was alone. I really wondered if I was doing the right thing or the easy thing.I wanted a sign. The texts from you and Alex, the nurse offering the ultrasound…”

“We’ll make this work. One way or another, we will make this work.”

“I don’t want you to feel like we have to jump into a relationship, Dean. We weren’t in one, not really. We can’t deny we’ve always been more than friends, but we can’t force something.”

Dean nodded. “Yeah, I get it. If we push something before we’re ready…”

“If we’re ever ready.”

“It won’t last.” Dean took a deep breath. “Let’s just focus right now on what we need to take care of now. You can’t hunt. I’m going Alpha male caveman here, but even if there wasn’t my baby…”

“I don’t want the baby at risk either.” Y/N smiled. She bit her lip. “I’m really hungry.”

“Oh?”

“I’ve been craving cherry pie.”

Dean’s eyes lit up. “Is that right?”

“I need food first though.”

“Pie is food!”

“Of course it is.”

~*~

Three days later, they were back in the bunker. Dean told Sam he wanted to stick close to home for a few weeks. Y/N had a doctor’s appointment in town and Dean had a surprise for her.

He wanted to rent an apartment for them to share.

He was looking at three bedroom apartments. He didn’t want to push her. Y/N had slept next to him the last three nights, but Dean knew officially sharing a bedroom was something they needed to build up to.

After a few hours, a call came. An elderly woman had a small house just a few miles from the bunker. She apologized that her apartment had rented quickly, but offered to rent the house to Dean for cheaper than he hoped to pay.

When he returned that evening, he was confident that Y/N would love it. He was taking her in the morning to see it.

“Hey!” He entered the library and saw her standing at one of the shelves. “I’ve got a surprise. I don’t want you to get upset but I was…Y/N?”

“My stomach.” She looked up with tears in her eyes. “Dean, it hurts.”

He rushed to her side as Sam came in. Sam moved next to Dean to help, but he saw the blood first.

“We should go to the emergency room, just in case.” Sam grabbed a blanket Y/N used something and wrapped it around her. Dean picked Y/N up as she cried out in pain.

“Something’s wrong!” She screamed. “Dean, something isn’t right.”

“Shh, Sweetheart. I got you.” Dean promised. “Sammy, drive.”

Sam drove as fast as he could to the nearest hospital. He dropped Dean and Y/N off at the door and parked quickly. He ran in and heard Y/N screaming.

“She’s in pain! She’s pregnant.” Dean was pale. Sam, again, moved next to his brother.  “Help her.”

“We’ll get her in an exam room. You can’t go in unless your family.” The nurse glared at Dean. “Are you her husband?”

“Yes!” Dean saw Y/N nod. “She’s my wife.”

“And he is?” The nurse asked as they were led into a room.

“He’s my brother.” Dean said.

“He’ll have to wait outside for now.” The nurse said.

Y/N was tough, but this was the worst pain she’d ever experienced. She held Dean’s hand and tried to breathe through the pain, but she couldn’t. It seemed to take forever before a doctor came in. Nurses were in and out, blood was drawn, eventually they allowed Sam in, and finally a doctor appeared.

“Hey, there,” He was an older man with a gentle manner. “We’re going to try and figure out what’s going on with your wife, Mr. Clapton. Mrs. Clapton, I know you’re in a lot of pain. We’re going to get an ultrasound and try and see what we can do to help.”

Y/N nodded slowly. “It hurts so bad.”

The doctor noticed the bleeding. It was soaking through the blanket. He motioned the nurse to grab another blanket. Y/N was laying flat and couldn’t tell. If she knew she was bleeding, she wasn’t acknowledging it. “We’re going to get you fixed right up. I’ll send someone in here right now to get that ultrasound.”

Ten minutes later, Y/N held Dean’s hand as they waited for the tech to speak. She turned the monitor so they couldn’t see anything. Sam casually walked behind her and she glared at him. He saw enough though. His face told Dean all he needed to know.

When the doctor walked in the next time, he went straight to Y/N and took her hand. She knew immediately that something was wrong.

“I’m very sorry.” He started. “Your baby is gone.”

“I…I had an ultrasound just a few days ago and everything was fine.”

The doctor shook his head. “I’m not sure who did the ultrasound, but they should have told you there was a problem.” He went on to explain the situation, but Y/N didn’t hear a word he said. Dean didn’t either. Sam was the one asking the questions they needed answers to. Sam was the one keeping a cool head. Y/N was hysterical all over again and Dean finally broke down when he pulled her into his arms.

Sam’s composure almost shattered when he saw his brother break. “What happens now?”

“We’re going to perform a D&C. It’s early in the pregnancy and many doctors would suggest letting it happen naturally, but I think this would be the best thing for Y/N. We’ll get her in the OR in the next half an hour. We’ll be there for about twenty minutes. It’s a slow day in recovery. The nurses will let you both back.” They had no one else that Sunday morning. The doctor had considered it a good day until Y/N came in. “I’ll see you in the OR, Y/N.” He looked at Dean. “I’ll come and speak to you after we’re done.”

Dean nodded. He held Y/N close until a nurse and an anesthesiologist came in. She had a hard time answering their questions but this time, Dean answered for her.

She already had an IV so once the medicine was administered, only seconds later, Y/N felt like she was floating.

“Dean,” she touched his cheek. “I’m sorry.”

“Sweetheart, you didn’t do anything wrong.”

“It’s my fault for what…It’s my fault.”

“No!” Dean touched her face with both hands. “This isn’t your fault. I’m so sorry this is happening. I’m so sorry I can’t fix it.”

“Mr. Clapton, we have to go.” The nurse told him. Sam reached out and squeezed Y/N’s hand. She gave him a small smile and then looked at Dean. “I’m sorry…”

“It’s not your fault.” Dean leaned down and kissed her softly. “It’s not your fault.”

Dean allowed his brother to pull him outside and he immediately looked around for something to punch. Sam grabbed him.

“No! I know you’re hurting but don’t do it, Dean.” Sam pleaded. “Y/N is going to wake up and she’s going to see you’ve managed to hurt yourself and she’s going to feel even guiltier than she already does.”

“She has nothing to feel guilty about!” Dean screamed. “This…Why, Sam? Maybe it wasn’t the perfect situation, but I was going to get something I wanted. I was going to be a dad.”

“You can still be a dad someday, Dean.”

“Really, Sam?” Dean asked. “I’m careful with every woman I meet. I’ve had two slip ups…”

“And two babies.” Sam looked down. “I took one away and now this…”

“She wants this baby, Sam.” Dean let his tears fall. “Y/N told me last night that she was letting herself get excited. She was going to call her family. She hasn’t spoken to them in years, since they told her that they didn’t support her hunting. Y/N wanted to tell them about the baby though.”

“I know it’s too soon to start thinking about it, but maybe once the dust settles, maybe once you’re both feeling better….”

“She’s going to pull away, Sam.” Dean looked at his brother. “Y/N is going to pull away. We didn’t plan that night. It just happened. It was perfect.” Dean smiled through his tears. “I realized that I wanted her. Not just like that, but….I didn’t want to ruin our friendship. I didn’t want to lose her and if that meant not being with her, I hated it but I wasn’t willing to risk it. Finding out she was pregnant…” Dean closed his eyes. “I always wanted kids, Sammy.”

“I know you do, Dean.”

“I thought maybe I was going to get that with Lisa. I really thought Ben was mine, but he wasn’t. I did a paternity test. Lisa never knew. I think that’s why walking about and going back to hunting was a no brainer. Lisa didn’t want more kids. I kept thinking that I would have the chance and then the world kept going to hell.”

“Dean, Y/N cares about you. She probably feels the same way you do.”

“She’s in there…our baby is gone.” Dean took a deep breath. “I’ll be damn lucky if she ever looks at me again.”

“She will.” Sam promised. “Look maybe it’ll happen, maybe it won’t. Yeah, she may pull back for a bit, but this is going to be hard on her. Her body is going through a trauma, both of your hearts are too.”

“How do we do this?” Dean asked. “This isn’t part of our normal….”

“No, it’s not something we’ve had to deal with.” Sam saw the doctor at the desk. “I see the doc. Go in. I’m going to call Jody. She and Donna need to know.”

Dean rushed in as the doctor was approaching the door.

“I had a feeling you’d need fresh air.” The doctor touched his shoulder. “Everything went well. She’s in recovery, resting. No one else is in there so we’re going to let you go in with her. She’s waking up a little bit. We just want to watch her for an hour, make sure she can keep a little food down, and then we’ll send her home. She’ll be more comfortable there, I’m there.”

“What do I do for her? How do I make her feel better?”

“My nurse is getting some reading materials together for you. It’ll be important not to push her. If she wants to talk, let her. If she doesn’t, just hold her. If she doesn’t want physical contact, don’t let it get to you. Her emotions will be all over the place to start.”

“Is there anything we should look for?”

“Depression isn’t out of the question. This isn’t something that will go away. It’ll stay with both of you the rest of your lives.” The doctor told him. “There’s support groups for parents. Some for both, some for just moms…”

“Yeah, I don’t know if she’ll go for that.”

“It’s there if she wants it.”

“Mr. Clapton, your wife is asking for you.” A nurse approached them.

“Thank you, Doc.”

“I’ll check on her in a few minutes.”

Y/N was quiet for days. She said nothing when Dean carried her straight to his bed when they arrived back at the bunker. She said nothing when he rubbed her back while she cried for hours the first few days. She said nothing when Dean cried and she rolled over to hold him.

Her first words in days shocked both brothers.

“I called my sister. I’m going to stay with her for a few weeks.”

“You’re leaving?” Dean asked.

Y/N nodded. “I need to get away from all of this for awhile. I think it would be best for both of us.”

“Are you sure?” Dean asked.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Y/N asked. She looked in his eyes. “Anxious to knock me up again already?”

“Y/N…” Sam shook his head. “Dean’s only worried about you.”

“I’m fine.” She sighed. “Look, maybe I let myself get excited about the baby. Maybe I thought that we could actually be parents.”

“We could.” Dean told her. “Not right away. Maybe we need to go about the relationship a little better. Like maybe be in one.”

“You want to be with me out of guilt, Dean.” Y/N shook her head. “We can’t do that.”

“Y/N, no. I don’t want to be with you because I feel guilty.”

“I can’t be with you because I feel guilty.” Y/N was shaking. “It was my fault. I was going to abort our baby and then changed my mind.”

“Sweetheart, the doctor explained it all to us. The clinic had to have known there was a problem. You said that you told them you weren’t doing it and got out of there fast. They should have said something, but did you give them a chance?”

“It doesn’t matter, Dean! In the end, it doesn’t matter because our baby is gone.” Y/N looked up. “I can’t be here for awhile. I just need to get away.”

“Let’s go together,” Dean moved in front of her. “We’re both hurting, Y/N. We both lost the baby…”

“Maybe that’s a good thing. I guess we’ll never know if you did take after John in that department.”

Her words cut Dean to the core. He loved his father, but John Winchester’s parenting had become a sore topic over the years. He had come to realize and understand that his father did the best he could, but sometimes in the worst possible ways.

“I’m nothing like my father when it comes to parenting.” Dean snapped. “I was Sammy’s parent most of his life.”

“And look how he turned out.” Y/N said the words before she could stop herself. “Sammy let the fucking devil out. Twice!”

“Get out.” Dean’s voice was louder than moments before. “GET OUT!” This time it echoed off the walls.

Y/N was shaking. She knew she crossed a line, but she also knew that it was too late. “I’m sorry.”

“Go.” Dean turned away from her. “Just get out of here.”

Y/N turned and ran for her things. The brothers were silent until they heard the heavy metal door slam and knew she was gone.

“I’ll be back eventually.” Dean grabbed his jacket and keys from the table.

“Dean.”

“I’ll be back.”

He ended up at a diner just outside Lebanon.

He ended up sitting across from Y/N.

“I thought you were going to your sister’s.” Dean didn’t look at her.

Y/N shrugged. “I don’t really want to. I just can’t stay at the bunker.”

“Why not?”

“You threw me out.” Y/N reminded him. “I was a complete and total bitch and deserved it.”

“Y/N, you’re hurting.” Dean sighed. “I am too.”

“I shouldn’t have said that to you. You….” Tears began to fall. “Dean, you’re a good man and you would be an amazing father. I hate that I took that away.”

“Sweetheart, you didn’t.” Dean reached across the table and took her hand. “You didn’t take anything from me. This stuff happens. It sucks and it hurts like hell, but it happens.”

“I don’t want to hurt like this again.”

Dean knew better than to make any promises. “It’s life though. The hurt comes and goes.”

“I don’t want to leave the bunker. I just feel so all over the place.”

“Come back with me.” Dean gave her a soft smile. “I’ll have Sam get your room ready. You need rest, you need time. I can give you that. I can help you, I can be your punching bag.”

“You’re hurting too, Dean.”

“And you’ve been there, even if you didn’t say anything. We can get through this together, Y/N, or you can get in your car and we never talk about. I was scared to lose you, our friendship, hell, even the chance to hope we could be together. I’m not going to push any of that. I just want you to feel better. I want you to not hurt as much, emotionally or physically.”

Y/N looked down. “I’m not going to be hunting much for the next couple of months. I have to take it easy.”

“Take a break from it all.” Dean told her. “Maybe I will too. Going back out there with all this on our minds won’t really help too many people. I know you may need a break from me, and I get it. I just need a break from other things. I need some time to deal with this..”

Y/N gave him a small smile. “Maybe we could help each other deal with this together.”

~*~

Y/N pulled the pie from the oven and smiled. It took her awhile but she was now able to bake any pie Dean wanted perfectly.

“Smells good.” Dean came in the kitchen. “What’s the occasion?”

“I just felt like making my husband a pie.” Y/N smiled at him. “How were things at work?”

“Research, phones, I threw an entire box of paper clips at Sam.” Dean shrugged. “Not a bad day.”

Y/N rolled her eyes. “You know, Sam is going to come up with a way to get you back one day.”

Dean wrapped his arms around her. “That’s one reason I keep you around.” Dean smiled. “I missed you today.”

“I missed you. I’m sorry I didn’t text more. I got busy with students and then had to rush out at three…” She laughed as the reason rushed into the kitchen.

“Daddy!” Four year old Ellen ran into the kitchen. “I did it! I did my front walkover perfect!”

“You did!?” Dean picked her up. “That’s great, Babygirl!” He kissed her cheek. “How was school?”  
  


“Boring. Miss Allie made us do shapes. I know my shapes.” Ellen said. “The lady at the doctor’s office was really nice too. She gave me candy and a coloring book all about…”

“Doctor’s office?” Dean looked at Y/N. “Everything okay? Did I forget something?”

Y/N shook her head. “No, but I was hoping someone else might not say anything since I bribed her.”

“I’m sorry, Mommy.” Ellen shrugged. “I told you I couldn’t keep a secret.”

Dean laughed. “Even I know that, Y/N/N.” He saw that dinner was ready and set Ellen in her chair. He walked to Y/N and took her hand. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” She nodded. “I asked her to wait to say anything. I planned to tell you later.”

“Tell me what?” Dean asked. He suspected something. He was hoping for something…

She kissed him and walked out of the room. He turned and waited for her to return. When she did, she had a small picture in her hands. Dean knew immediately.

“Sweetheart?”

“I’m pregnant.” She smiled. “I’m twelve weeks and six days. I should have told you but I wanted to be sure. After everything…”

Dean nodded. “I know after the last time, you weren’t sure you wanted to try again.”

“I wasn’t sure I wanted to but we also said we’d leave things up to fate.” She leaned in and kissed him. “We’re going to have another baby, Dean.” She wrapped her arms around his neck. “We are going to complete our family.”

“I can think of one thing we are missing.” Dean told her.

“What’s that?” Y/N asked with a teasing smile. “A dog.”

Dean shook his head. “A mini van.”

Y/N laughed at his joke. “No way in hell!”

“We do need to look for a family car.” Dean led her to the table. “Sit. I’ll serve everyone.”

“Dean!”

“Hey,” He kissed her softly. “You’re having my baby. I get to take care of you.”

Y/N smiled back and saw her daughter watching with a smile of her own. Y/N turned back to her husband and caught his wink at her. Fate made some choices that she didn’t like. Some she never thought she could live with.

When Fate choose Dean Winchester to be the man she’d spend forever with, she knew there was a reason she went through everything else.


End file.
